Surviving Matric Madness: The Real Risks No One Talks About
If you’re the parent of a child currently in Matric, I don’t need to tell you what a rollercoaster of emotions the next few weeks create.
Final exams are just around the corner, and 12 years of formal schooling are almost over. It’s a rite of passage most children in South Africa go through and is often described as the most significant milestone in their academic journey.
Matric is the gateway to every child’s future, paving the way for a world of exciting opportunities and future careers. But without that vital certificate, university and college are off the table, and all but the most menial jobs are out of reach.
Expectations are immense, and failure doesn’t bear thinking about.
With so much riding on the next few weeks, all Matric pupils will feel anxious and stressed at this time. Some, however, feel it more than most, and the statistics on Matric-related anxiety and depression are hugely concerning.
The South African Depression and Anxiety Group (SADAG) quotes statistics from the Psychiatry Management Group saying that as many as 20% of high school learners in South Africa have tried to take their own lives.
Suicide currently accounts for 9% of all teenage deaths in the country.
Roshni Parbhoo-Seetha, SADAG’s schools outreach coordinator, warns that although pressure intensifies during the matric season, it manifests itself throughout the year.
“The increased expectations of our learners of today begin long before that final stretch of exams, with rising levels of unemployment, increased emphasis on accessing tertiary education, and a global economic fallout contributing to high levels of anxiety,” she said.
“It’s really important to change how we talk about final exams. Right now, there’s an enormous amount of pressure placed on results, and it can make teens feel like their whole life depends on them.
“While it is natural for learners to experience some form of anxiety or stress around exam time, the weight of the culmination of 12 years of school leading to one final examination can take a serious toll on a student. We want our Matrics to understand that while these exams are certainly important, they are not more important than their mental health or their life, and the results do not set their fate in stone.”
Unfortunately, it’s not only the exams that are a source of stress for our Matric youngsters. The entire last year of school is filled with events with the potential to cause significant anxiety.
Not least of these is the infamous Matric Dance.
Both loved and hated by parents, the Matric Dance is supposed to be a celebration of our children’s imminent launch into adulthood and all the opportunities that provides. In reality, though, it’s often a thinly veiled competition to see who has the most beautiful dress, the flashiest arrival car, or the best-looking date.
For those youngsters not in a position to compete, what should be a celebratory evening can rapidly descend into one that makes them feel inferior to their peers, and bad about themselves.
There’s also the very real danger associated with the notorious after parties.
While most schools ban alcohol at the dance itself, once pupils move off campus to other venues, the situation can quickly descend into drink-infused chaos.
No one will forget the tragic deaths of 22 youngsters in 2022 at the Enyobeni Tavern in the Eastern Cape. They had been celebrating the end of their Matric exams.
In December the following year, three pupils from Mnyanande Secondary School in Durban died in a car crash after another year-end exam party. In the same month in East London, five teens were hospitalised after over-drinking at a so-called “Pens Down” party.
These are just a couple of examples, but there are, tragically, many more. Matric Dance after-parties and the end-of-year “Rage” or “Pens Down” events are littered with incidents of alcohol and drug abuse, drunk driving, sexual activity, and even sexual assault.
For many, these parties are simply a way to “blow off steam” and release the pressure that’s built up during the year.
But for far too many youngsters, they have life-changing consequences; futures ruined before they’ve even begun.
As a parent myself, I know parents around the country are deeply concerned about the mental, physical and emotional health of their Matric children at this time of year.
Fortunately, help and support are readily available – for pupils and their parents.
“Supporting matric learners during their exams is not just about passing tests or getting the best results,” says Chris Kemp, a clinical psychologist. “It’s about passing on the message that their well-being matters – that they are more important than a mark on a piece of paper and that, regardless of the outcome of their exams, they are loved and accepted unconditionally.”
We can remind our children that disappointing matric results are not the end of the world. Learners have access to re-marking, supplementary exams, and bridging courses.
SADAG suggests that well-meaning comments from parents, such “I know you’ll do well, you’re so smart,” could unintentionally create additional pressure instead of helping to motivate the learner.
They recommend shifting the focus from results to experience, starting conversations around how your child’s feelings rather than their study schedule or how ready they are for a particular exam.
“Do not underestimate the importance of your capacity for understanding in your child’s life – your empathy is irreplaceable,” they say.
It’s also invaluable to be able to spot warning signs of excessive stress, anxiety, and potentially suicidal behaviour.
Dr Sebolelo Seape, chairperson of the Psychiatry Management Group, says these could include:
Loss of interest in usual activities
Changes in eating and sleeping habits
Withdrawal from friends and family
Neglect of personal appearance or hygiene
Running away from home
“Alcohol and substance abuse, unnecessary risk-taking behaviour, obsession with death and dying, and numerous physical complaints linked to emotional distress, are also signals, along with feelings of boredom, agitation, nervousness, sadness, loneliness or hopelessness,” she added.
“Some teenagers may actually give verbal hints by talking about death and dying directly or indirectly. They may talk about wanting to die, begin to dispose of much-loved possessions, and they may write a suicide note. All threats of suicide must be taken seriously.”
SADAG is an excellent source of help and support for parents and pupils, offering a free support group and interactive live sessions on coping skills.
You’ll also find coping tips, as well as additional help and resources for learners, parents, families and teachers on SADAG’s website.
You can also reach out to a counsellor on SADAG’s 24/7 toll-free suicide helpline: 0800 567 567, 0800 456 789 or 0800 12 1314, or send an SMS to 31393 and a counsellor will call you back.
There is also a WhatsApp number – 087 163 2030 – that’s available Monday to Sunday from 8am to 5pm.
“The most important thing to remember is that there is always help available,” SADAG said.
Wishing all our Matric learners and very safe and successful exam season. Please take care, think, and make great choices.